Come On Ladies, Feel The Burn!!

So, how was your Halloween?  Did you dress up?  What was the cutest costume you saw Saturday night?

I usually am not one to participate in costume rituals unless I can come up with something really creative, but there was going to be a contest during Boot Camp on Friday afternoon for the best costume, and it was strongly encouraged that we all participate.  I couldn’t think of anything for a few days … but finally, two days before the contest an idea was born … Richard Simmons!  It’s perfect for boot camp – the costume is work-out appropriate (even if the shorts are a little too much so), there is no make-up to sweat or smear off my face, and it wouldn’t be too hot.  So, the hard part would be finding the correct wig and accessories.

As you know, Richard can be a little flamboyant, which is fine with me … makes the costume that much more fun.  I started at a Halloween Super Store in Orlando.  At first, my eye was caught by a 1970’s men’s afro-wig, complete with side burns, mustache and chest hair.  For only $9.99!!  As I was making my way toward the cash register, I walked past THIS little number!  And I thought that even though it isn’t “dead on” Richard, it has enough curls and hints of red, not to mention the sweat band!  So what if it’s not teased and frizzy?


Afterwards, I walked about a mile down a busy roadway (not worth wasting the gas – more exercise is fine by me)  to Sports Authority and could not find anything “flashy” enough.  Nothing with shimmery stars & stripes, no satiny finish to the tank tops.  I was speaking with my best friend while shopping and at one point during my frustration I just held up my hands and cried, “Where the hell can a gay man find suitable workout apparel!?!”  Luckily, the store was almost empty and no one really heard me. 


During a squabble between my friend, J and I over the thickness of wrist bands I should buy, J suddenly remembers that she is at home.  Therefore, she has access to Google Images and looked up some pics of Richard.  Turns out our memories were making him out to be MUCH more whacky than he actually is.  Actually, I take that back … now that I’ve perused into some of the 1980’s pics it’s clear to see that Richard has just toned down a tad in the last 20 years.  Which was great news for me because I couldn’t find anything flashy or short enough for the 1980’s Sweatin’ To The Oldies Richard.

I opted for the wig, some red wrist bands, short red jogging shorts and a blue tank top.  Sorry, I have no picture YET to post here, but I will as soon as it is emailed to me.  (I know, what the hell is the point of writing about it, if you aren’t able to visualize?  I hear you, and I apologize.)

My only competition for the costume contest was my friend Isabel in the class.  She had talked such a good game a few days before the contest I was a little nervous she would show me up during the contest.  She went as a Whoopee Cushion.  It was funny, but not as good as Richard, if I do say so myself.  Actually, our boot camp guru agreed and I won the coveted full service car wash gift certificate!!

Which is great because my car is in GROSS need of a bath!  More on that later this week …


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